Has it ever happened to you that you’re wondering how to act in a specific situation or you don’t quite understand what someone wants or what is required of you. I think I’ve had plenty of these. On rare occasions, these situations have come up in conversation without me planning to bring them up, and the other person has asked: why didn't you just ask? Well, indeed.
Not to go into the depths of my heart and soul, so simply — yes, expressing my needs, in the broadest sense, has been a problem. It feels amazing to notice this and even more amazing is doing something about it.
Last week, coming from the countryside — and things have already happened at that Olerex service station :D, for example trying to bond over reusable cups, unsuccessfully, as part of my 100 conversations project — I pulled up to the pump to put some petrol in the car when my daughter asked me to get a chicken wrap for her. The breakfast had been early and it was lunch, so for once this made sense ;) Now, I filled up the tank and then the conundrum - should I go an pay and get the wrap, leaving the car where it was? But this way I´ll keep the pump occupied. Or should I drive to the parking lot and then go inside, pay, order the wrap and wait for it being prepared? But this way I seem to be fleeing without paying and I don’ t want to appear to be stealing petrol because they would notice right away and come running out and I would be banned from all petrol station forever… Tough choices, aren’ t they?
My overthought plan then: go pay for the petrol, move the car to the parking space, get back in to get the wrap. I know.
And I did carry out the plan. With an important exception. I actually asked the guy behind the counter what do they expect their clients to do in such a situation. He said that fuelling up, moving the car to a parking space, and then coming inside is fine.
I was delighted that I noticed this, that it occurred to me to just ask.
I hope I´ll keep doing this.
☀️
You're not alone on this one :)